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This is me, #MoreIndianThanYouCanImagine, surfing channels after a strenuous day.
Being more Indian it is my inborn instinct to look through the advertisements by companies to search freebies and cheaper alternatives they throw upon us and I had certainly become #MoreEnlightenedThanYouCanImagine over the years of absorbing all the advertising that had gone inside the brain cells. 

#MoreIndianThanYouThink, tag line advertisement of Lufthansa caught my attention. Having travelled long hours, and by now slowly perfected meals order days before boarding the flight, got my mind thinking. I had come to know in due course that fish was a vegetarian dish unless specified as Asian vegetarian. I lauded the sincere efforts of Lufthansa for thinking Indian

My thoughts went on to the airline providing cheap airfare (name of airline withheld, but can be provided upon personal request.) but charging for the use of lavatory. My Indian friend had been caught by the instinct to save money and had boarded the flight. Plane took off after a delay of four hours and he used the lavatory four times before the takeoff and somehow withheld the urge of eating so as to avoid more pooping and end up paying more. Not to mention how his heart was at full attention to sustain any roller coaster swings that ensued, with seat belt tightly fastened all along the journey that seemed to take an eternity. At last, as he disembarked the plane, he had been transformed completely. He had understood the value of life and never had his prayers come sincerely from heart, but now his heart had learnt better communication skills with the God almighty. 

More Versus Less

Scene dates back to 2001. I am sitting in the cafe lounge of Oberoi Grand, at Kolkata. Person sitting next to me is my younger brother in his twenties and myself in my thirties. The gentleman sitting in front of our table is a gentleman in his fifties or so. That chat revolves around aimless topics. We all are awaiting eagerly for a new entrant at the table, daughter of this gentleman, for a brief chit chat. It's been half an hour already and the wait was taking a toll on my head as I should be boarding train in two hours and train would certainly leave without waiting for me. Here we were waiting.

For those who didn't get why this set up was arranged, I must elaborate upon it. My younger brother was to meet a girl, talk to each other and if both agreed, a pure Indian matrimony would be the end result. My mind delved back onto the delay and rising chances of train leaving without me. 

Till the girl enters the scene I must tell you about the gentleman in front, the girl's father. He had come to take an interview of my brother and at the time he had entered the office, my brother's face was deep inside a big watermelon he had been eating in pure Indian style, with all the juices dripping upon the newspaper placed upon his lap. It was his pure Indian upbringing that he avoided use of spoon and fork in eating. He always enjoyed licking fingers sumptously while eating. Gentleman could have rejected him outright, but he had agreed for the meet up with his daughter and here we sat waiting for the girl to arrive. 

Soon a gorgeous model in high heels and stunning looks entered the scene hurriedly towards our  table. I looked in dismay towards the gentleman, mind trying to digest the lineage to this absurd looking man. She excused herself for the delay and banged head on to the points on agenda. I gave a cursory glance at my brother and could understand the dismayed bewildered look. It all came as a shock and I just waited for the dust of the storm in the mind to settle.

She had a pleasant air of curt ambience around her and the start of the talks by her was in no way Indian and I can say with certainty, "it left the ultra western culture way behind."

I had some mugged up questions, which I had thought of asking, and then deciding the  outcome after weighing in her answers. My questions had just vanished in the storm and she started the topic by asking question boldly directed at her would be future mate, that is, if she passed him in her exam. She had transferred the game in her court. 

I remember her first question distinctly reverberating in my ears, "what are your expectations from your life partner?"

I thought my brother would say something of devotion, ultimate love, faithfulness, delicious cooking, touching feet of elders, worship in house temple early in the morning , never scold, and what not......,mind was still busy searching virtues amply needed in housewife, but the the rash answer that came up froze my mind, "No expectations at all." he had blurted.

I looked at him with stern eyes, as if to silently hint him to regain his senses.

Her second question came instantly, as if duly satisfied with his answer, "How will you keep your life partner?" 

Again my mind started looking for more proper typical Indian answer, like I never like to be disobeyed, whatever frugal means are there, she has to make the best out of it, and mind you, never complain, etc. but the answer by him sent my mind into a tizzy..." She will always be in my heart, and in house she will be at liberty to do whatever she pleases."

I understood that my brother had fallen for the outward beauty and he cannot be shown any sanity of inner beauty of the heart. 

My mind delved in to a flashback,, where a German fellow passenger had become my friend in train journey and we had gotten talking on various topics. This man was ISCKON devout and a follower of Lord Krishna, denouncing his Christian beliefs. He had confided that he loved the Gita, and Indian preaching, and was baffled by the culture such the Indian women touched the feet of their husband and seek blessings. He had gone back to Germany with his new ideologies, and had asked of his wife to touch his feet and seek his blessings and his Doctor wife had divorced him the same very day. How I had pitied his misconceptions.

Here, I could sense his heart slipping by into an unknown territory, to let his mind be crumpled and bequeathed in chains for life and I was merely helpless. I knew this one sentence would crop up and it did appear sooner than expected, both young birds excused and left our table to chit chat in solitude, as if made for each other. I was left with the old gentleman to carry on the silent sips on coffee which had just arrived. 

People may think of Indian and Western and more Indian or less Indian, but ultimately we are Humans with big Heart.Lufthansa has set the ball rolling thinking Indian with #MoreIndianThanYouThink

More or Less,

I chanced to see the latest Lufthansa advertisement with "MoreIndianThanYouThink" and my mind revered into the past.

 I was amazed, bedazzled, walking the streets, in a small village in America with my son. I saw a board "Garage Sale" and having never seen such a thing in India, out of curiosity, we both walked towards the guiding arrow. There were a variety of household goods up on display, and a man in his fifties was seated upon a chair. A bicycle caught my attention and I thought this would come handy in commuting and asked the gentleman the price. He said 15 dollars and out of reflex I said 10 dollars. This gentleman smiled at me and asked me if I hailed from India. He gave the bike for 10 $ and it was a real steal at that price because the lock that I had to purchase for that bike was 15 $. 150% more than the cost of the bike. This gentleman was a great fan of Shashi Kapoor, as he confided in me and we had a long chat that day. What pained me most that this gentleman was selling all his household stuff and house as well and planned to move to some other town on and a struggle phase was set before him. 

Bargain is in our veins and no matter what we do find ways of discounts. Getting things at our reduced price has the extra charm and zing. 

Then in Newyork I had entered a chinese shop which had a closure sale board hanging and all goods displayed were priced at 80% discount. After my hours of deliberations I chose one big crystal showpiece and went to the counter to pay the money. I couldn't dare bargain here as already the price was low. At the counter the lady asked me to pay an extra amount of tax and hearing that I just chose to forego the purchase. The China man saw that I was leaving, came upto me and asked if I was from India, and I proudly nodded in affirmative. He scolded his employee and said to give the goods without tax. More than the savings, the enjoyment of having things at great discount pacifies the mind and infact it is #MoreIndianThanYouThink.

Ohh God !!! The Manipulators

I used to listen and did enjoy listening to Godly speeches by emminent saints. 

Today I happened to listen again a whatsapp clip of another saint ( God knows better if he is a saint ).

This clip was instigating a particular religion masses to make proper house of lord and one should be ashamed of living in marble houses with airconditioned rooms and their God was residing in a small place. 

My mind which seeketh the inner light and knows for sure that the God is present inside each and every human being, burning and rioting to build an abode for God will serve what purpose.

When will there be a law strict enough to punish the ones playing with human values.

These onesided utterings are the catalytic
ingredient utilized by the hardliner manipulators of another religion to manipulate and poison the minds of their masses.

Ohh God!

2000 note ban

Yea, I am trying to predict the near future. Beware countrymen!

I foresee a 2000 rupee note ban to curb black money effectively. 

Exact date of announcement is just known to our respected PM.

Aap doshmukt kiye jaate hain.!!!

Yes, I am doshmukt. This world's court gave this clear verdict and now I know I have just acheived this feat on clear grounds. 

I will strictly order my kins to bury these verdicts of innocence when I grow old and leave this heavenly abode for super abode as these might come in handy there aswell.

God is great!!!

Autobiography of an Actor

Yes, I confess. This is my confession statement. Buying awards for 30k. This too to deprive a genuine winner of the award but this is my confession statement and I should be prosecuted as per law of land. Did I mention that I had met a gangster as well and drank tea with him in a foreign land. Yes, drinking tea is not a crime and at that time he hadn't committed heinous crime, so I should be excused for that offence. 

My conscience rose above the limits of fear and I took the opportunity to confess.

May God grant me the forgiveness. 

Trouble, Laugh or Cry

2nd January and it is a foggy morning today. I got up with a little heavy head and getting tea in bed could be the thing I desired the most and I got one without asking as my dear is very prompt at that.
Sipping tea as I surfed the whatsapp messages, I saw one quote, "cry at your troubles and they will double, laugh at your trouble and it disappears like bubble." Mind was trying it's best to put that piece of info in head but it kept getting rejected firmly by my stealth brain. 
I couldn't eaven dream of calling my trouble as trouble without the risk of getting hit on head, let alone laugh at it.

Other troubles be it where they are, I try my level best not to poke the "birni ka khota" and only wait for them to resolve by pity of God........, 

2017 January 1st.

Yes, Sun is shining bright on the horizon and I am beginning the first day of 2017 by a note of thanks to all dear friends who stood by me and penned valuable inputs upon my  insignificant rants.

I strive to work my heart and mind to full potential towards my goals. A thought did creep into my mind upon the recent speech of our hon'ble Prime Minister of 7:30 P.M. yesterday, and the word that hit the mind was "BEIMAAN" and the resolve that they won't be spared. Now this classification only meant for the business class because these are the ones who steal tax. Now big tycoon mega conglomerates who take billions of loans and just switch themselves to another country may have been beimaan but now they have left for their own good and are imaandaar contributors to that nation's economy with their clean pounds and dollars. 

Why this much fuss of crucifixing the beimaans? Just tell them to leave the entire nation to be hogged by politicians to their heart's extent and join the Naga baba community in the himalayas. 

God knows who is Imaandaar.

The Olive Branch

This is an Olive branch in the hands of Pakistan and behind it is China's hand giving it the push to be accepted by India. 

What a dramatic scene : Behind this Olive branch are the terrorist outfits which continue with their agenda unabated. Warning by China it will block India's bid to ban these outfits in U.N.

In what world are we living. The whole world is fighting this menace of terrorist outfits and what a clever manner the highest echleon honchos turn blind eye to the rhetorics of terrorist factions as if they will be concerned only when this snake tries it's go at biting them. 

God knows If Modi Goverment will accept the Olive branch of gesture, but one thing is sure, two things can never run side by side.

Pagla Party

I am starting "Pagla Party"
Manifesto : 
1) Scrapping all facilities of all politicians. They have to to get their renumeration from their followers. Their all properties will stand seized and schools will be opened in them.

2) In parliament every politician will be bringing own tiffin to eat. No freebies.

3) All taxations will be scrapped. All present tax officials have to teach poor students in the houses vacated by politicians.

4) Voluntary Swecchaa Daan of 10% of profits will be expected of all Indian citizens, to be deposited in "India Welfare Fund".
There will be no checking of accounts. It will be a voluntary affair. They can give more, but it will be their wish, no forcing.

5) All religious bodies will be allowed to practice their religion within the confinement of their personal homes. All processions or public show of religious grandeur will be treated as National disgrace and dealt with strong laws with an option to leave the country for their good or be hanged till death (their choice). All places of worship will be remodified to become Hospitals with free services to all citizens.

6) Logo will be the skeleton head of Trinasaurus and all volunteers can wear this type of face and start canvassing for the Pagla Party to come in power.

7) All Indian citizens will be given 10 days time to disclose their black money abroad and bring it back to India and employ it in rebuilding the nation. No questions will be asked. All their money. Anyone failing to do so, and later found out will be dealt according to the law of land. First will be their photographs pasted in all public urinal pots. Rest we can devise more laws.

8) All system of caste classification will stand scrapped and all titles of surnames will be considered just mere names. Merit  will lead and all poor will be provided with best possible infrastructure to sharpen and spruce up their talents.

I, RioZee hold all rights to this Pagla Party. 

God's Towel

Ladies are very particular about their things. I think it is an inbuilt mechanism in their brains. If by chance one opens their wardrobe and closes it, without touching anything, they would know that wardrobe had been opened and start demanding clarifiacations. One should thank the Goverment that their one announcement made the once the hidden arena to open up and all wealth of hidden preservations came out into the open. Mind admires in awe and is in sheer admiration of their talent at acquisition and preservation.

Overheard a talk that was going on between a sophisticated Lady and her Mother in law in temple, "this towel is particularly God's bath towel." 

Yes, They are particular with their things aswell as God's things aswell. No messing there.

Alexander and his acquaintances with Indian saints

This takes me back to the writings about the Alexander era. I will try to keep it as simple as possible. 

Alexander had been impressed by Dandamis, a great Indian saint and had asked of him to leave India and go with him to his country, to which he had refused, saying that he was happy serving one master, God and the meager things he needed to support the body were abundant. 

One of the disciples of Dandamis, Calanus, Indian name Kalyana, got lured and left India and accepted Alexander as Master and left with him. Calanus grew weaker there and realized his mistake and took upon a decision to self immolate himself. He conveyed his desire  to Alexander and everything was arranged for him to depart in pomp and glory. He was provided the best horse which he gave to his greek disciple Lysimachus

Calanus didn't flinch in fire, and accepted his death smiling. He prophesized about Alexander's death in Babylon, saying, we shall meet in Babylon. 

Grammar Falooda

I see people harping grammar and its rules to be followed with strong killing voice. Take a chill pill guys. Life isn't as bad as you are making it. When I die, hopefully, God will not be giving me a surprise test to write a grammatically correct composition, and condemn me to eternal hell for a wrong use of Past perfect continuous tense. 

God knows why I have written this post. For students, learn all while you can as later the zeal and stamina will be lost finding the past participle. 

Good day.
Tag : ,

Suicide a tragedy

Very beautiful take on Suicide by Sriram Aiyar written with emotions simply breathtakingly well. 

I have faced myself many scenarios where the mind of the person enduring was shaken to such extreme levels that anything could have happened. Lucky are the ones that get timely god sent counsel.

Many times simple jokes lead to further aggravated situations. I remember my travel in train where four friends played a prank on a poor friend. They were returning jovially from Ajmer after visiting Dargah and were returning back to Mumbai. 

Suddenly phone of a friend rang and as he started to talk his other friend grabbed the phone and said, "Bhabhi ji, we changed plans and are headed for Mussoorie. "

I was shocked to hear the conversation. The victim friend tried to say something but her wife knowing nothing had started her barrage of accusations and the guy's male ego hurt to the extent that he started talking of a divorce.

The whole atmosphere in my compartment had grown tense. 

Suicide was what he was thinking as he stood at the gate of running train smoking trying to swallow the insult in front of his friends. 

I had sensed the need of sound advice, which I was bursting to shell out upon him and struck a conversation. 

To cut the long story short, I had thwarted a suicide attempt. 

There have been many instances which I could easily relate to the book. 

All in all a great endeavor.

I, the great

Whatever I do is right. I am famed. I can hold two three countries citizenship whether allowed by my country's rules or not. I form company abroad and when pointed of my wrong doing, instead of admitting mistakes, I point daftly back at the person as maligning my stature. Supreme Court too is afraid to accept petitions on my probe, not even the PM of India. 

By now intelligent ones must have understood what I am ranting about. 

Kids will be kids

Kids will be kids and as a parent I had always opted for toys from which they could learn something new. When I bought a colgate packet and seeing the pictorial play for kids, I bought all four types as I wanted to spruce up their thinking abilities.

I gave my nephew the package and I was amazed to see the gleam in his eyes and an instant run in to see what treasure lied within. The luminous pictures reminded me of my fancy to picture books in my childhood days. 

The pictures of different theme sets of magical sea world were really impressive. I understood how much brains these Colgate people must have put in to bring it on platter for kids. I remembered my childhood when I used to buy Frootie candy and I was more interested in the wrapper containing the different sets of animal pictures which I used to paste on the album and look for the missing animal pictures with frenzy. I still remembered the total number of pictures were 90. I Had succeeded in filling the the album. Those were plain days without technology but now kids were technology oriented. 
Colgate Magical Sea World was based on 4 themes, Coral Reef, Pirate Ship, Sea Magic and Treasure Hunt. 

Nephew started hollering, "Tauji, taau ji, Bring some more packets. There will be more of different themes". I pacified him to be satisfied with what he has got. When they launch some star wars sets, you will get them first. He was a little disappointed but started playing with them. He started explaining me the picture stories like an adept. 
" Taau ji, you know this, you know that," as if I knew nothing. It looked kiddish to me but the enthusiasm with which he went into the plot made me play the game as he wanted.

"Have you gone to the bottom of the sea?" He asked me and I admitted that I hadn't but one day I would take him there and he could play with real octopuses. He rolled his eyes in bewilderment saying, "Octopus will catch us and eat us alive." I tried to appear shocked and said we will go with knives to save ourselves. The amazing part was he knew he could save himself with knife but his reaction was ultimate," Taau ji, aap to gaye." (Taau ji, you will be dead.)

I tried to cajole him, "won't you save your Taau ji from the octopus," and he said concernedly, "I have to save myself also, but after coming out I will definitely try to get you out."

I thanked him for saving my life, and he stressed upon me to take him along if I really wanted to be saved from wild sea creatures.

I was thinking if it was his child brain just wanting well of me, or it was his calculated efforts of going to sea in reality. Whatever the reason, I was deeply moved and asked once more, "how are you so confident of yourself?" He said, Taau ji, "these are all friends, if we do not harm them. " I got the point. 

I am really thankful to Colgate for thinking up  of this offering for kids to build their imagination. 

Wow Datsun Redi-go

RioZee sat thinking about the latest innovations in the car making arena and the giant car makers spending heftily upon bringing about latest innovative technology efficient cars to the consumers. Gone were the days of simple cars. 

There were many new offerings that attracted the mind and the one that had hit strongly upon the mind was the latest offering by the almighty tycoon, Nissan, the Datsun Redi-go.  Mind wasn't getting off the features that had been portrayed and in this age of digitization, the sleek mobile holder kept tantalizing the mind. 

The speed recognition steering wheel was a feature unavailable in great many models and this was one thing offered in a hatchback segment priced utmost competitively. Mind wasn't grasping the features on offer. A test drive would clear everything and laying hands on the steering wheel at the first chance was indeed craved by the mind. 

The ground clearance was also really great keeping in mind the speed bumps hither and thither. 

Another great feature that lured the mind was the small turning radius. Yes, this was surely the utmost needed feature as taking out and placing the car in small places was really a heck of a task for a man who didn't opt for the luxury of a chauffeur and always drove in self drive.

Mind always boggled seeing a road bump and whenever it heard a thud sound hitting the lower end of car, heart always skipped a beat giving the mind the added torture. The latest offering of Datsun Redi-Go looked really cool for these features. The new ventilated disc-brake feature too looked really cool. In this busy world with busiest roads, applying breaks every now and then was a common dilemma. Saving the life of others with pro efficient brakes was one hell of a feature presented.

Datsun redi-go amazed the mind by it's cutting edge technology. World was changing rapidly. 

It's really tough to find a car with the features of your liking but this was one presentation which boasted of all the features one could imagine. Now test drive could only prove the things that were stated and I looked at a test drive in Delhi area only as I stayed there. I was sure the features were really super great and that also from the leading brand of the world. How on earth could I miss the opportunity. 

Driver airbag was another superb feature which was simply astounding to find at this devastatingly low price band.

Mobile docking station was really remarkable feature to see in the brochure. 

Child lock feature was another thing that was really convincing for safety reasons as there was small child at home and I was really impressed by the company's research work in designing such a great marvel. I really appreciated the great effort went on in the making of this great car. 

Datsun redi-go, the real urban class allured upon my mind now to
plan a great test drive as early as possible.
  • Fun. Freedom. Confidence. The ultimate Urban Cross - Datsun redi-GO - the capability of a crossover with the convenience of a hatchback.

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